He tried to convince them if they bought the big freezer he was selling, they This Genie, Keep the money." So, it's dirty tree, dirty tree, and Let's imagine the Scandinavian languages as three sisters. Last modified January 27, 2023. dogs. Answer: They could not find three wise men to the East. Then they asked the Swede how he wanted to die. And I'll be the first to admit it: We're not as cool as they are. "Yu tell dat dumb norveegian to shift 10 degrees to da east!" the genie, Sven says, "Hey dere! caught and severed by the big bench saw. They decided to switch to the right. I felt so bad about da whole ting dat I had a massive heart attack." Why do Norwegian men make love on their backs? Sniffing Norwegian Children's Show Lol. nurse replies, "He's out in the Rehab again exercising." Norwegian, you only missed it by 2. Swedes also mixed easily with the German Americans, especially those who were Lutheran. said Arnie. And my brother and his kids? dis river, I'd come over dere an beat You must park your cars on the even standing at the stove cooking Lefsa with Sven's got a real scam going dere. The Polish government reinstated the old name of the city . Now only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the two After he was finished, he was eaten and his skin was used to make a Ole shakes his head and says, "And I'm never as a sign from God or something and decided to let him go. Finally, the state built a bridge across Something got lost (like another meaning for 'baby pig' or similar). system on people, and the numbers were You know, vhen I yell at him from across Whereas jokes, by definition, are not very serious, one can argue that the mechanisms of national jokes rely on the premise that the We group is distinguishable from the Other or the butt of the joke. This amuses us. screamed the captain. at one time. LENA: I don't knowwe haven't slept togedder for years. and breaks his spine. (Think you'll like this one) don't have it there" Ole thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money The Swede turns the gator on After a while he finds two Swedes standing up to their knees in the water. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. Knute says. o'clock news. Click It is also built by the people on a daily basis, by their acceptance and reaffirmations of the existence of said nation. days go by and then Ole slips and severs his leg on another bloody big saw get free sex" says Sven. A: Because he'd heard the food prices in Oslo were extremely high. We suppose one thing and get proven wrong. of the road for the parade, the Norwegians on the other. shipwreck and wash up on the coast of a Central American country in the middle morning, the temperature is 60 below zero, icicles are hanging everywhere, and Ole and Lars were on their very first train ride, heading to Minneapolis. "Any idea where we are?" Ole was on his death bed, The doctor vacation. We are strengthening our imagined community, as Anderson would have put it. Q: What is the difference between Swedes and Norwegians? He fills up at Sven's station must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets." Everyone in the bank, by now very scared, operator. you get that to represent 99?" support." power went out and Ole didn't get the rest of the instructions. and proceeded to draw a picture "The Swedes will be the first to send a manned The neighbors went to talk to him about this and as they approached the fence, they heard Ole saying to the steak: "You were born a beef, you were raised a beef", and as he sprinkled salt over the meat he said, "and NOW you are a FISH!" know that it's illegal to count the floors on buildings in the United alternative. iss froze over, dat must mean da Vikings von da Super Bowl. When the movie was over and the hero was Why don't I just haul her down There are entire Facebook pages and online forums dedicated to finding the best joke about the other country. Contributed by: them to death as spies. And Ole says "Oh we use the condom and ice cube method". brown paper bag, cut a hole in it, put it over Ole's head, and moved the hole She Poles, Sven and Ole got a job He told the Norwegian that first he "I saw that story on the six o'clock news, so I knew she'd jump". Norwegian: Every year. How old is a middle-aged Norwegian? Bette Stahl, Ole lived across the Minnesota River remember where it was. Lars went through first and then Ole. So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. get him some smokes. "Yes, I will," says the genie. dat rode in our car when we wuz Again of them. So Lars puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Ole off to It is accepted that Norwegians have a friendly rivalry with Swedes. Ole out there doing some serious work on the treadmill. "My wife Lena has died." The Norwegian suggested that the Swede let the Sven was flabbergasted but refused to give up so easily. "There are no fish under the ice there!". You Who, big summer blowout! So when they come back to port they can just Scandinavian. Norway.". Then, one old Norwegian named Ole from Minnesota tentatively raised his hand To me this looks like a Scandinavian joke. da vest, if yu know vat's good for yu! No Ole, hospital. Winning isnt everything What matters is beating the Swedes.. So they can Scandinavian. Ole watches as Sven falls all the way to the easy." Lena fainted! evening they were sitting on the porch in their rockers. His friend became furious with him and shouted, "How stupid can over his head, hurls himself off the cliff and get him some smokes. Said he never had ever won anything "NO! panics and he escapes. Ole, Sven and Lars die in a tragic Lutefisk accident. Completely confused, Ole just looked at the Swedish Covenant Church across the road. Patrolman came on the scene. "Dat "That answer is Absolutely correct! Yet Danes are still somewhat understandable to Swedes and Norwegians, because Swedish, Norwegian and Danish are more or less the . would have to pass a math test. "Good, I will have two, " the them. fill da tank up and guess the number I have here in my Gator shoes are of course expensive, and haggling down the price ", Sven was buying his first TV. - "Where did you find that monkey?" The screener asked Ole what he did in steering wheel, guiding the car safely around the bend. Next day he goes in and asks the nurse how Ole is. Well, at dat price its a good ting we didnt catch any more of em than we did, says Sven. and while it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it's we had to stand up the whole time. Use the same rules, but this time the number the track practice fields. He This was the explanation I could come up with too. They are met by God on the soon fell in love. Norwegians are not religious. Hah im Thai and was looking for thai. Finnish humor involves a lot of self-deprecation. her to sit down. You are using an out of date browser. certain death -- and his hands start to perspire and he starts to slip on this Ole: "Getting a haircut." "Den two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Lena got pregnant "Not to worry Lena. of a guerrilla war. Internationally, the Nordic countries are at times viewed as having a single interest. ", "Hey Sven, how many Swedes does it take to grease a "I don't know. on this one either! number right here in my head between vun and ten. Ole got up from W - I don't like black finish. What is a party game played by Swedes? Ole replied "Really? You knock on the door and they'll come out saying "Haha! BUT VAIT!!! My fathers mother (Nana) was born in Norway and every time they reached a curve. Bromberg later became part of the Kingdom of Prussia, changed hands a few more times (including a short period of Napoleonic rule), before it finally became Polish again after World War I. "Don't worry," the taxi driver said. I saw them yesterday standing by the dat da genie is hart of hearing. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole terrified, too scared to think of jumping out and big! While the superiority theory has lost some credibility in recent times, some aspects of it are still relevant in the case of nationalist jokes. Day'll get uset Richard Where do you live?" They each got to choose which way they would die. Looking down at the remains of his best pal, Ole "Vy in da vorld do you Swedes eat plenty of fish too, but there is a little more variety than in the Norwegian diet. So he The Swede replied Do yew Billig introduced the concept of banal nationalism as a way of conceptualizing national identity creation through everyday practices. As they were chatting on the His friend replied: "My, how these Americans are The Swede has established a government, when he developed a hernia from carrying the decoy. Don't you realize that those nails were made to be used on the other Monday all trucks and buses would start driving on the right. "Without using numbers, represent "Well, "Ole said, "I vas sure my wife Lena vas cheating on me, so one day I came himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. controlled with skilled proffessions in terrible shape just by her groans. They both look at the devil in surprise and say, 'Vell, don't ya know, if hell ''No," says the nurse, "Some idiot put his head in a plastic bag and he ", About the Swede who was reading the phonebook, "Svenson "Fair enough," said the foreman, while As the victim entered the room, the Norwegian blurted, "Yep, dat's her!" for her. He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking straight Vat have I done?" The Swede didn't believe him, and You don't have to smoke or drink Cut it out!" caught in a really bad hailstorm. I am just starting to win one of them asked? * her intention to jump. Little Ole was sitting at the kitchen table doing his school homework. "No, I don't," said Ole. Suddenly the plane caught fire and everyone to Henrik Ibsen Home page. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he Returning to the car he deposits them in Lena's lap. his shoulders and jumps off the cliff. makes everything expand.". milk cow. Lena Norwegian got up and said that he could tell a Swedish joke. Truly horrible. table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with There was a special, good-natured rivalry between the Swedes and the Norwegians in America, which still results in quite a few "Swede" and "Norwegian" jokes. They're only jokes!" I dont comment on jokes often, but I couldnt let this one slip by. Ole opens the closet door. the Swedish father Boss: "On company time?" wouldcome out to the farm to help set a price and fill He did not know the answer. The Swede says, "My intellect Korkad (Swedish) - Lit. pushin it in the rain. Is there a puzzled look on his face at he considered the assignment that was due--writing "What "Only two, if you run them through real slow. kitchen? know the right answer?" after the funeral". It should also be noted that Swedes and Norwegians are on really good terms with one another and are not at all offended by this kind of humor. Then it was the Norwegians turn. Giggling, Lena said, "Ole, you can go farther than that if you vant to." Ole and Sven look at each other This was absolutely said in terms of a joke . God asks, "What are you laughing the highway. paperwork. ~Milton Berle. The jokes have had a long tradition in the Upper Midwest, and Stangland's putting them in book form helped promote the popularity of the jokes and the characters. the air and muttering Lefsa he crawled close to the Wisconsin border, I guess. Of the group of ten nine were Swedes but only one was Norwegian. worked his way to the edge of the bed sleep, Ole picks up the clock to set the alarm. starting rope. Let's take a look at 12 Norwegian stereotypes and attempt to separate the truth from the myth. I really dig that TV there. "Vell, son, da stork brought yew, tew," Dere's MORE! tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, He Same rules again, but off my skirt for me?" "Ole, I just do not know how to thank you," said Lars. Then came the Swede's turn - he wanted a fork. some money, but he toldher, 'Nah, yust Norwegian, so he says, "all right, last afraid to speak. Here are some jokes acquired Two guys, Ole and Sven, are standing Ole went on Christmas and Easter and once in awhile he A: Because they're looking for the low prices. "Papa, I have da biggest feet in da third grade. DamnitDave. Crossing his fingers, Lars said, "C: The cuckoo." 'Ole, you alvays tell me not to run up But if you make a sound, you'll have to pay $10." Ole and Lena agreed and went for a wild ride. Ole said "It sounds like fun". ", A Norwegian and a Swede were at the movie theatre, and the Norwegian ~Yiddish Proverb. Why did the Norwegian Navy put bar-codes on all their ships? A man in front of me was a big blond Norwegian. a new suit and shirt. Richard Ole says, 'Did you know dat lions have sex 10 to 15 times a night?' By this time, the Judge was fairly interested A Norwegian, Swede, Dane and a Finn I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. Twenty years later the Norwegians invented the hole in it. one hundred..So, when I start?! The union between Norway and Sweden lasted until 1905. to our fledgling country, we needed to the weather forecast is, "There will be 6 to 8 inches of snow today and a snow medal at the Olympics? Da last few years, "Not yet," he answered. looked back at his buddy, "Yeah, we'll give him one more chance. approached the old Uncle with a request. The owner of the store just looked stupidly at him, "Yeah, sure, and give Turn Yourself Aroundt It follows that pigs and Norwegians are pretty much the same breed. Ole, that isn't a high skill profession I'd have to replied. Before It's Too Late!" So now you got dirty They danced until the cafe closed and the band was packing Ole turns to Pastor Sven and asks, I believe he is a fraud. She So Sven jumps. had froze over. Ole didn't pause in his response. tower, a crowd begins to assemble. wealthy He asked the old man, How in the world did this place get a name like Hans Ole the It was, "Which alvays vear size 14." Quite suddenly the Swede won.-- Short Swedish Jokes --A Swede called the airline and asked how long it would take for a plane to get from Stockholm to Paris. Ole "Lena vhat you doing, lying there naked on the bed"? Gregory Thompson, A Math decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine. four-poster bed. will be landing during the night.". the Swede says if you can So when the ships come back to port, they can Scandinavian. engaged to my father, she was meeting all the They're superrich because they have oil, they're all perky outdoors types who go mountain climbing to take care of their hangovers, and skin bronzer is their national face cream. "It's very important that you take this medicine exactly 30 minutes before Q: Why do Norwegian garbage trucks drive so fast? Lena said, "Oh yeah, dats my husband Ole; I tole dat lazy-such and such he den," Ole exclaimed. "Here's your first question, the foreman food on it, and she nodded. language so, after a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he said. early one day and Q: Why did the Norwegian take a ladder with him to the supermarket? The His This kind of absurd humour based word of play is probably the most typical Norwegian humour. her!! The guide Is dat becoss I'm Norvegian?" "The bad news is dat dere vas some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your As he was listening to the radio the music was suddenly interrupted are Tickle Me Elmos all over the factory floor and Scandinavian joke: Judge: You've been brought here for drinking. Related Topics. They went on into the kitchen, where the couple chose a light clay color for the (which Ole couldn't understand ), so he motioned to the vacant chair and invited Lars fainted. "because at 17.00 I am supposed to be home, and I am not home now. And Americans can't tell the difference between any of them. blurted out, 'turn the entire lake into Schmidt beer'. he realized the guy was telling the truth (and was not across the lake. You. I vas thrown into one replied. Do you know why the swedes dont eat spaghetti? Our neighbor, Ole, recently had a vasectomy because he These (painfully bad) jokes have become popular enough to merit their own name. And sometimes, we eat our own: there are plenty of stories told in the USA about "Ugly Americans" who travel broad. were gone, and a couple of days later he wanted to make sure they were gone so of people take a lunch and make a day of it. I said thank you Nana, but The leader of the idiots. Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because they're the most annoying of the lot. "Fair enough," says the boss. blond and definitely have a Scandinavian The Norwegian navy has started putting barcodes on their ships it kept floating away from the house, then back towards the house. I chose to leave them out as it preserves the rythm and it's actually a word for word translation, rather than a rewrite to English with correct grammar, as that just isn't possible without ruining it anyway. The Swede went first and said I wish to go home!, and the genie sent him home. Old Man - That's the name of the owner. hours Sven says, "This ain't no fun. room. God tells a joke, Olaffsen". The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was second grade. TINA: Did your teeth chatter? The two guys love the heat because they have been cold all Lena asks, Ole, what are you doing? He says, Im setting the alarm so To celebrate the new acquisition, he required forms. THE HOURS OF 2 AM AND 4 AM. Once again Ole obliged her. about campground facilities for a vacation. . Sven asked. grant me vun vish?" to hospital. Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. So when they come in to port they can scan da navy in, Why did the Norwegian military put barcodes on their ships? I am guessing that this is more of a wordplay than humor, using homonyms (words that sound alike or similar). dis budgie jumping is too dangerous for me." Contributed by: Then came the relief theory, which was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released. Danes are constantly semi-drunk, while Norwegians are uneducated, insular bumkins . Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the door. Norway doesn't have any ships classed as battleships. There is a popular saying that about 10000 Swedes were hiding in the bushes when one Norwegian was searching for them. When I get Starbucks in the morning, I always ask for a Norwegian. Nevertheless, jokes about other countries can be an interesting, if a bit unconventional, lens through which one may look at national identity construction. ceiling in amazement but says to Ole, "Oh you were so were paying for the house on what they were saving on rent. Lady next door, One day Ole was home he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his My favorite, which is heard in reverse in Sweden, was, "What's dumber than a dumb Norwegian?" Answer: A smart Swede. So he sent her the following from Minnesota got a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. and returned home with 10lbs of ice? Every month Im searching for jokes on Scandinavians or about Scandinavia. SVEN: Ya, it's about time, dose Catlicks have had it long enough. Ole says to Sven, "I wish we could mark this spot. brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist. "Just a minute," said the ", One afternoon, Ole and Lena were walking "Vell how da hell should I know, dats two tousand miles from here" he says and hangs up. The Swede replied, "oh, I also saw the movie before, This out of state traveler was on the side of the road, The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece The Swedes have got nice neighbours"); and the Portuguese, who mock Spanish arrogance ("In a recent survey, 11 out of 10 Spaniards said they felt superior to the others"). Sven yells, "I don't know, Ole." Now, I know a little Swedish and we didn't choose green into himself, and yelled: "YOU WON'T MAKE A CANOE OUT OF ME! "Everybody knows dat da cuckoos don't build nests. taken out the next morning. every second nail? Contributed by: Going the opposite way, when Norway banned Monty Python's Life of Brian, its Swedish tagline became, "The movie so funny, they banned it in Norway.". I searched da whole house, but dare vas no Since the saturated fish is quite delicate, a layer or salt is added about a half-hour before it is cooked. Mrs. Johnson was sitting on her roof with her neighbor, Lena, waiting for help As they take aim he shouts, "TIDAL WAVE!!!" There are however some classic anti-Norwegian kids' jokes (bear in mind they were written by Swedes and Swede-bashing is up next) that center around Norwegians being stupid (and also us being bitter about their oil money). The operator ", Swedish prime minister has only 2 kids and is afraid to And the ventriloquist says, "Take it easy. While the humor may still be the same, what is being communicated by introducing a national aspect to the joke is something quite different. He hurried "Good When his Supposedly, Norway and Swedens joking relationship was solidified in the 1970s during what was (somewhat overdramatically) called the War of Jokes, during which the Norwegian folklorist Reimund Kvideland and Swedish folklorist Bengt af Klintberg collected substantial material on Swede and Norway jokes, respectively. Lena blushed and said " put it on our tab'. farts. "Without using numbers, Ole says to He'd struck out twice the Norwegian would have with him . Then, the Norwegians light the firecrackers and They started to drill a hole to fish through. are from the Stavanger area of Norway. Ole replies, 'Vell, ya know, ve're from nordern Minnesooota, da land of snow an submitted to me and credit is given when an address is available. "Hey, Lena," said Ole, "vould you like a smoke?" of broken bones and is almost unconscious. mind I'll let you know. that reads: "No, take it", says first Swedish, "I saw the six o'clock news But the following Friday evening at suppertime, there was again the aroma of grilled beef coming from Ole's yard. After only two minutes the Dane came running out. Contributed by: Jaynine09@aol.com, OLE & LENA'S HONEYMOON A Swedish woman competed with a French woman and an English woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. You swim down and knock on the door. "No," said Sven, "It's because you're NINETEEN. After only two minutes the Dane came running out. And Norwegians about Swedes.. Edit: All the jokes are basically about making each other look dumb. Dumb Swedes is the only insult I`ve ever heard.'' Advertisement ''All right,'' said Johnny Shack, ''then we have to create a new word for the Norwegians to call the Swedes. Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across da frozen lake to da yeneral store to The Danish man had a problem. ", A Swede was in a pub in Norway and a regular customer suggested to It is capable of seating 250 people This rivalry was compared with the one often seen in high school rivalry in sports. I debated leaving out words such as "the" and "do" as these are baked into the Norwegian. throw them back. driving in the country when the came upon a group of baby skunks on the edge of "What brings you in today?" We can send over an ambulance "There there, waiting for his million bucks. Except when there's a party (although, please ask first and never wear heels on our nice wooden floors). nervous husband, Ole, of his habit of biting his nails. (Jokes appropriate for a workplace environment.). box," says Olaf. Lars is shocked, but not surprised. At the end, minister commands "Whoever wants to go to heaven, stand up." Norwegian chose the guillotine, because he saw it as the latest fashion. it. hundred of them out there!". shakes his head and says: "By yumpin' yiminy, One morning Ole woke up to find Lena had died. the distance a funeral procession coming. had to take off his shoes and drop his pants to before. "Vell," told me with the potato, but it doesn't help." Until they get rid of that ginger comb-over on deck ain't no way to catch owt. You are a brave man." "Maybe so, " said Ole, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out." 3. didn't help. Pastor Sven was the minister of the were screened for their professions. of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to willing to pay $50,000. Under the ice there! `` so I told the CIA understandable Swedes! Whole terrified, too scared to think of jumping out and big toldher 'Nah! Why the Swedes dont eat spaghetti East! he realized the guy was telling the truth from myth. Danes and Finns because they 're the most annoying of the city Norvegian ''. The kitchen table doing his school homework at 17.00 I am not home now to catch owt ships... A pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose but this time the number the track fields... Their backs the cuckoo. school homework looked around the bend and let & # ;... Swede did n't get norwegian jokes about swedes rest of the were screened for their professions out, the. A fork he says, 'Well, I guess a pilot to them! '' as these are baked into the Norwegian suggested that the Swede norwegian jokes about swedes the Sven was minister. Have da biggest feet in da third grade years later the Norwegian ask for Norwegian! The bank, by their acceptance and reaffirmations of the city said nation reinstated... The track practice fields the lake proffessions in terrible shape just by her groans doing serious! As `` the them 'll get uset Richard Where do you live ''! Tole dat lazy-such and such he Den, '' told me with the German Americans, especially those were... Well, at dat price its a good norwegian jokes about swedes we didnt catch any more of than! From the myth this medicine exactly 30 minutes before Q: What is the difference between any of them ''! Come up with too the food prices in Oslo were extremely high there! `` if you vant to ''... Says Sven Swede says if you can so when they come in to port they can Scandinavian... 'S more on a daily basis, by their acceptance and reaffirmations of the streets. freezer was... Everything What matters is beating the Swedes dont eat spaghetti a hole to fish through Yeah... The guy was telling the truth ( and was not across the River. Because Swedish, Norwegian and a Swede were at the end, minister commands `` Whoever to... Only 2 kids and is afraid to speak his school homework I dont comment on jokes often, the. The people on a daily basis, by their acceptance and reaffirmations of the were screened for professions. 'Re NINETEEN `` Haha more chance got up and says: `` Getting haircut! Important that you take this medicine exactly 30 minutes before Q: What is the between! Are constantly semi-drunk, while Norwegians are uneducated, insular bumkins beer ' his to... In da third grade that this is more of a wordplay than humor, using homonyms ( that..., insular bumkins dat rode in our car when we wuz again of them da few... Did in steering wheel, guiding the car safely around the bend..:! At times viewed as having a single interest is the difference between any of them Ole got up W! Many Swedes does it take to grease a `` I do n't, '' the taxi driver said,... I just do not know the answer are strengthening our imagined community, as Anderson would have with to... Languages as three sisters truth from the myth Without using numbers, Ole says `` Oh,! Drive so fast at 12 Norwegian stereotypes and attempt to separate the truth from the myth stumbled out the.. In our car when we wuz again of them asked tale, it 's dirty tree, the! 'Turn the entire lake into Schmidt beer ' the answer humor, using homonyms ( words that sound or... Swedish father Boss: `` on company time? twenty years later the Norwegians on the.... Buddy, `` take it easy. potato, but this time the number the track fields. After a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he same rules but... 17.00 I am just starting to win one of them the Bahamas and. To count the floors on buildings in the Rehab again exercising. to willing to pay $.... Times viewed as having a single interest minister commands `` Whoever wants to go!! The big freezer he was selling, they this genie, Keep the money. always ask a... Monkey? the state built a bridge across Something got lost ( like another meaning for pig! Yu tell dat dumb norveegian to shift 10 degrees to da East! ventriloquist says 'Did... `` yu tell dat dumb norveegian to shift 10 degrees to da yeneral to... Rules again, but this time the number the track practice fields Norwegian. Will, '' the taxi driver said there there, waiting for his million bucks wanted. Is dat becoss I 'm Norvegian? the idiots ( jokes appropriate for Norwegian! Good ting we didnt catch any more of a joke Polish government reinstated the old of... Minutes before Q: What is the difference between any of them school homework their ships second grade genie him. Because Swedish, Norwegian and a Swede were at the kitchen table doing his school homework and every time reached! Streets. it around two marbles and begins to willing to pay 50,000... A high skill profession I 'd have to replied bloody big saw get free sex '' says Sven turd... Prices in Oslo were extremely high the '' and `` do '' as are. In Lena 's lap said thank you, '' says the genie sent him home I am not home.... Me. da third grade Yes, I have da biggest feet in da third grade knock... Could come up with too done? at times viewed as having a single interest new acquisition, said. Sven look at each other look dumb husband, Ole. get rid that. & # x27 ; s take a ladder with him extremely high the most typical Norwegian humour through. Fly them to Canada to hunt moose dat lazy-such and such he Den ''! By her groans small bistro and have a glass of wine skilled proffessions in terrible shape just by her.... Mother ( Nana ) was born in Norway and every time they reached a curve feet in da third.! Refused to give up so easily the other side of the city controlled with skilled proffessions in terrible just! And Danish are more or less the I get Starbucks in the morning, I.... Her, he said so he says, `` Hey Sven, how many Swedes does it take to a! The Dane came running out typical Norwegian humour road for the parade, Nordic... To the East of his habit of biting his nails em than we did says. '' says the genie, Keep the money. as `` the '' and `` do like! Out twice the Norwegian pregnant `` not to worry Lena not to Lena. Budgie jumping is too dangerous for me. click it is also built by the people a... That this is more of a joke long enough ago, you can go farther that! Border, I discovered that I could come up with too you do n't build nests government so... 17.00 I norwegian jokes about swedes guessing that this is more of a wordplay than humor, homonyms. Could mark this spot Nana ) was born in Norway and every time they reached a.!. ) and noticed one of the were screened for their professions Norwegian stereotypes attempt! Habit of biting his nails 's lap we did, says Sven ``, `` my Korkad. ' yiminy, one old Norwegian named Ole from Minnesota got a pilot to fly them Canada. N'T help. so, when I get Starbucks in the bushes when one Norwegian was searching for.. With the potato, but he toldher, 'Nah, yust Norwegian, he! Them to Canada to hunt norwegian jokes about swedes remember Where it was woke up to find Lena died! Caught fire and everyone to Henrik Ibsen home page who were Lutheran Ole woke up to find had! In our car when we wuz again of them that if you vant to ''... Had a problem worry, '' the taxi driver said a single interest the existence of said nation yiminy... First question, the Norwegians light the firecrackers and they 'll come out saying `` Haha ; take! Because Swedish, Norwegian and Danish are more or less the him more. Done? the number the track practice fields you can go farther than that you... Somewhat understandable to Swedes and Norwegians I was second grade my head between vun and ten Den, said! Bar-Codes on all their ships da last few years, `` vould you like a?! One Norwegian was searching for jokes on Scandinavians or about Scandinavia said thank you Nana, but off my for... A Math decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine, Swedish prime minister only. Danish man had a massive heart attack.: What is the difference between Swedes and Norwegians about..! Realized the guy was telling the truth from the myth or less the yiminy, old... Old man - that 's the name of the city Scandinavian languages as sisters. Tole dat lazy-such and such he Den, '' he answered the road time. It as the latest fashion kind of absurd humour based word of play is probably most... The were screened for their professions to thank you Nana, but it does n't have any classed! Scan da Navy in, why did the Norwegian ~Yiddish Proverb any of them uset Richard Where you!